When folks think of trauma, they often imagine a single, overwhelming event—an accident, an assault, a natural disaster. But for many, trauma doesn’t come from one moment. It comes from being targeted again and again. From words that cut. From exclusion, ridicule, intimidation, or harassment that slowly chips away at your sense of safety and self-worth.
Bullying and harassment—whether experienced in childhood, adolescence, the workplace, online, or within relationships—can leave deep and lasting emotional wounds. And often, those wounds are minimized. “It wasn’t that bad.” “Other people had it worse.” “I should be over this by now.”
If you’ve ever told yourself those things, you’re not alone. And you’re not broken. What you may be carrying is unresolved trauma—and EMDR therapy can help.
How Bullying and Harassment Impact the Nervous System
Bullying and harassment are not just “mean experiences.” They are threatening experiences to the nervous system. When someone is repeatedly targeted, their body learns to stay on high alert. Over time, this can lead to symptoms such as:
- Chronic anxiety or panic
- Shame or persistent self-doubt
- Difficulty trusting others
- People-pleasing or avoidance
- Emotional numbness or dissociation
- Depression or hopelessness
- Strong reactions to criticism or conflict
- A deep belief of “I’m not safe” or “Something is wrong with me”
When you’re humiliated, threatened, or rejected repeatedly, your brain and body do what they’re designed to do, which is to try to protect you. The problem is that long after the bullying or harassment ends, your nervous system may still be acting as if the danger is present.
Why “Talking It Through” Isn’t Always Enough
Many folks have talked extensively about their experiences of bullying or harassment. They understand logically that it wasn’t their fault, but the feelings remain.
That’s because trauma doesn’t live only in thoughts—it lives in the body and nervous system. Traditional talk therapy can be incredibly supportive, but it doesn’t always reach the parts of the brain where traumatic memories are stored. This is where EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) can be very helpful.
What Is EMDR Therapy?
EMDR is a research-backed trauma therapy that helps the brain reprocess distressing experiences so they no longer feel overwhelming or present-day. Rather than reliving events in detail, EMDR works by using the brain’s natural healing processes with bilateral stimulation (such as eye movements or tapping).
In EMDR, memories that were once “stuck” begin to move, and the emotions and intensity of them decrease. The body relaxes, and new beliefs can take place.
How EMDR Helps Heal Bullying and Harassment Trauma
Bullying and harassment often create deeply ingrained negative beliefs, such as:
- “I’m weak.”
- “I don’t belong.”
- “I’m too much.”
- “I’m not enough.”
- “If I speak up, I’ll be punished.”
- “People can’t be trusted.”
EMDR doesn’t try to convince you these beliefs are wrong, but it helps your brain change them by reprocessing the experiences that created them in the first place.
As EMDR progresses, folks often notice:
- Reduced emotional intensity when thinking about past bullying
- Less shame and self-blame
- Greater confidence and self-trust
- A stronger sense of safety in relationships
- Improved ability to set boundaries
- Relief from anxiety, hypervigilance, or numbness
Many are surprised by how specific moments—comments, looks, incidents they thought were “small”—can cause such strong emotions. EMDR helps to decrease those emotions and intensity.
EMDR for Childhood, Workplace, and Adult Bullying
One of the strengths of EMDR is that it can address bullying across the lifespan. Whether the experiences happened in elementary school, within a toxic workplace, in online spaces, or in intimate relationships, the nervous system responds in similar ways.
You don’t have to remember every detail or “prove” that it was bad enough. If it left a mark, it matters.
You Are Not Weak for Being Affected
Perhaps the most painful impact of bullying and harassment is the way it turns inward. Many folks believe the problem is them—that they’re too sensitive, too reactive, or not strong enough.
EMDR helps shift this. It recognizes that your reactions were survival responses, not personal failures, and it allows healing to happen at a pace that feels safe and supported.
Moving Forward
Healing from bullying and harassment doesn’t mean pretending it didn’t hurt. It means no longer living under its shadow. EMDR help to lessen the effects the past has on you so you can move forward with more freedom, confidence, and self-compassion.
If you’ve been carrying the invisible wounds of bullying or harassment, help is available and and healing is possible. Reach out to the EMDR Center of Denver to schedule a free consultation today.
More research on the effectiveness of EMDR for bullying and harassment:
Gessica Cross, LCSW
Gessica Cross has helped people find greater joy and healing from prior trauma, anxiety, and depression, as well as processing grief and life transitions. She is formally trained in EMDR and graduated with a Master’s in Social Work from the University of Illinois with honors. She moved to Colorado after completing a post-graduate fellowship in India in which she provided pro bono work among survivors of kidnapping, abduction, and human slavery. She has specialized in helping people recover from situations of trauma, depression, and anxiety for the last ten years. She is excited to work with you!